Today I want to talk about the year I turned 15. It was my sophomore year of high school. I was reflecting on this year over the weekend, and you’ll find out why in a moment.
When I was 15, I had never met my husband. I had no idea what college I would go to. I had a hard time imagining life when I would be living anywhere but with my parents, in the house I had lived in my whole life. My sister, who turns 19 next weekend, was just a kid. I often felt extremely angry with the world, in that inexplicable way that being a hormonal teenager makes us feel things we don’t understand. I spent all my free time reading, writing ferverntly in a journal that I decorated with stuff I cut out of magazines (cliche much?), and playing clarinet in the marching band (shut up). My most important priority was that my hair needed to look good. I had never been to a yoga class. I had only been kissing boys for two years. I had never fallen in love.
It seems impossible that any part of who I was then could translate into who I am now, but one thing does, and that’s what I’d like to write about today. The year I turned 15 was when I found the Indigo Girls. : )
This was back when I would go on long walks on my parents’ country road with my tennis shoes and my Sony Discman. How did I ever go on long walks without my iPod and Crocs? I don’t know. But one day, my friend Molly burned me a copy of the Indigo Girls’ album Retrospective. I incorporated it into my country road walks, and I was instantly in love.
I have come so far and changed so much since then, but I still love the Indigo Girls. Nothing about my day-to-day now remotely resembles my day-to-day as a sophomore in high school. But I still love the Indigo Girls. My other favorite bands at that age have fallen to the wayside (Dave Matthews Band, Matchbox 20 – now good for only a nostalgic streak every now and then). But I still love the Indigo Girls.
What does this have to do with yoga? Well, not much really, but it’s my blog after all. : ) And if I were to offer a connection, it would be that yoga means union right? Well, the Indigo Girls are the uniting factor in my life.
Their melodies and lyrics have been with me through most of high school, my first love, a hard breakup, all of college, starting a life of my own, dating my now-husband, my wedding and honeymoon, countless road trips, old friends, new friends, my fledgling career, everything up until this very moment in time. Their music has evolved along with me through the years, while my favorite color, food preferences, pant size, and general life philosophy have all changed too many times to count. Even now I will hear a song I have known for years and a lyric will jump out me and I will think to myself “So that’s what that means!”
I even got to meet Amy Ray at a concert in February of 2008 (after standing outside the tour bus in the freezing cold for a couple of hours). And I am extremely excited that this month I accomplish the second of my list of life goals: to see them in concert again.
So here’s to good music and constancy through life’s ups and downs. I’ll leave you with some lyrics that have been resonating with me more than usual these days:
And the best thing you’ve ever done for me, is to help me take my life less seriously. It’s only life, after all. (From “Power of Two”)
And there’s always restrospect, when you’re looking back, to light a clearer path. Every five years or so I look back on my life, and I have a good laugh. (from “Watershed”)
There are avenues and supplements and books stacked on the shelf. Labyrinths of recovery in search of our best self. But most of what will happen now is way out of our hands. So just let it go, see where it lands. (from “I Believe in Love”)
Find that bit of faith that sets you free from having everything to prove. (from “Dairy Queen”)